beautiful love.

--5 dollars--

t'was not complicated,

nor overly long

but a simple tale
of a boy and a gal.

it was on a beach i chanced

upon such beauty

peerless and absolute

as you shall soon see.

she had eyes of sapphire

lips crimson like fire.

her skin was porcelain,

her bearing, of a saint.

with a smile so beautiful

she beckoned me over

and whispered softly,

'have you got 5 dollars?'

puzzled i grinned,

and pulled out five coins

our hands touched as i passed it over

and i felt a stir in my groin.

'so what are u gonna spend

that 5 dollars on?'

'oh nothing much...

just some flavored condoms.'

eyes starting to widen

as i let out a squeak.

am i hallucinating

or is she coming onto me?!

my palms got sweaty

as i looked nervously away

'oh, whatever for,

if ask i may.'

'well, what do you think'

she whispered seductively.

oh my god!

her voice is so sexy!

'um,' i stammered

excited and eager

'i think its for sex...'

and i started to tear.

because you see

i'm so old i'm embarrassed

forty years old

forty one this august.

since i was a kid

everyone called me a nerd.

with my socks pulled high

i guess i am, in every sense of the word.

thus its no surprise

when i say i'm a virgin.

when u're at my age

i think that's a sin.

so i wiped away my tears of joy

and grabbed her by the hand.

'come my sweet maiden,

let's make love in the sand!'

as i gazed into her eyes

i was so happy i could sing!

i'm going to lose my virginity,

to this alarm clock's ring.

oh. damn it.

--5 dollars--