usually, at some point in life, we are troubled by who we are, who we were, and most importantly, who we are going to become. and more often than not, we are unhappy with the first two and thus aim to make the last one a good one. so what factors into our choice for who we are going to be?
a common and delusional idea many have is that appearances do not matter. thats like saying suicide isn't wrong. perhaps to you yourself you see no fault with it, and perhaps, there really is no fault with it, but it is just a perception, a view. of course, we all understand that views and perceptions have no right or wrong, by way of definition. however, i am a guy who likes definites and clear black and white(which is troubling because no matter how hard i look, things are always gray), so i choose to define perceptions on practicality.
people, we live in a democracy(shhh, if you correct me the secret police will catch you). and a democracy is founded not upon freedom, not upon choice, not upon rights. democracy is founded upon "majority power". it is a simple yet effective mechanism. times in which there is a difficult decision, one that you cannot or will not make, a common reaction is to push away responsibility. be it the relief of finding a solution to problem, or removing the guilt from making a difficult decision, by removing the concept of "choice", we can achieve it. so its ironic in this sense, that despite us being a democracy, a demonstration of free will and spirit, its founding is based on the taking away of that choice. because clearly, stats show that while well educated, over 50% of people in the US are unable to make politically sound choice if they were placed in a seat of power.
(ok i made that statistic up, but i think its logical. even if there is less than 50% of politically-uneducated people, the majority choice might still be the wrong one. lets say, a choice between sending soldiers into Iraq. 35% of the people are uneducated, and choose to send the soldiers in cos Bush was so charmingly patriotic. then another 20% are the professional analysts, military generals, and self-assured couch potatoes. together that would add up to 55% majority choice that, in my opinion, was a bad one. disagree if you want, your beliefs are not wrong either.)
so if the welfare of the country is truly at stake, a democracy is not necessarily the best structure to adopt. politically educated and patriotic men can make the decision for the entire country that will best lead us to satisfaction and fulfillment, with no choice on our part.
it is at this point that i find holes in all that i've typed... but too late. lol anyway, point is, when it comes to making difficult and hard decisions, leaving it to someone else is often times better. sometimes you dun even know it. if your parents weren't there to guide you on to a future-securing academic trail, you might just be working at Macs now, wondering if you have enough money to both fill your stomach and your closet. (but they also dun really understand us and thinks that we would all be happy as rich lawyers. so i take my parents' advice with cautious acceptance and evaluation).
so what am i getting at here? how is majority choice linked to (scroll up) appearances and suicides? well, as majority choice is the center of our societal structure, i believe majority opinion is just as quintessential to our personal choices and decisions. in other words, appearances do matter. alot. you dress as a homeless hippie, or a skinny jeaned goth freak; thats not getting you a job. probably a few snorts and laughter at that office. you pick your nose in public and shout vulgarities whenever you feel like it, it'll be hard for you to find acceptance in a sophisticated environment. you have a face run over by a truck and dipped in dog shit, it won't matter if you have a heart of gold; the chances you'll find a life partner is equivalent to throwing a stone from a building and hitting Justin Bieber. the possibility is there, its great if it happens, but good luck finding it.
look deep into yourself. appearances do matter. you can tell yourself how being true to yourself is most important, how being yourself is most important, but when are we being ourselves, and when are we being socially unacceptable? if i feel like punching the lights out of every Jonas Brother fan or mugger, is actually doing it being myself, or doing something which disrupts the social structure and should not be done? perhaps its both. and when it is, which do i put priority on? the implications are the same for everything else out there. this is an extreme example but it applies to so much. do i wear this hairclip to school? is it being myself or being socially unacceptable? do i wear a skirt this long? is it being myself or alienating people from me? do i mug just cos everyone is? if i don't, is it being myself, or deviating from an eventual maturity everyone else grows into? and when the choice comes to decide which is more important, how do we choose? how do we decide how much of ourselves to lose in order to fit in, or how much of ourselves to keep at the cost of loosing everyone else?
and when it comes to such difficult choices, we find it hard to decide. and most of the time we leave it to; you guessed it. majority opinion. majority opinion says this clip is too huge and disgusting, i shall not wear it. majority opinion says that such a long skirt makes me a prude, so i won't put it on. majority opinion says that studying is good for you. so i shall mug.
dun worry, i recognize that not everyone is like that, but don't be too smug yet. those who think they do not act according to societal norms, and are exhibiting uniqueness and strength of character, are actually simply choosing to do the opposite of societal norms. case in point, emo people, feminists(i'm sorry i fear for my life i'm too young to die tell my parents i love them i leave all my belongings to anyone who wants them), and fashion forefronts. many of these people claim to have a personal voice, and strength of character, but many of these find these voices by simply doing the opposite of societal norms, in an effort to stand out. this may in fact be subconscious. these people feel that everyone is conforming to societal norms, and that is bad, a sign of weakness, a sign of surrender. they then set themselves on a path to challenge these societal norms, in order to differentiate themselves. fashionistas frown upon those not well-dressed. its been shown that feminists, while hating men who have traditional ideas of women, actually hate women who conform to such ideas even more. emo people... well they're a class of their own and i don't really get them. if i had to say, its that they cant find acceptance of who they are in society and thus choose to alienate themselves; its easier to find companionship in hate than in love. by banding together as people who have a "personal voice or suffering no one can understand", they gain comrades in hating society, easier than finding friends who love them for who they are deep down.
especially people who defend their stand and views strongly. this can mean a lot of things, but one of them is insecurity. same as how someone who is actually insecure with himself will do outrageous things to get attention, an opinionated person will be very expressive and strong about their views and thoughts. an example can be for instance... emo people shouting out who they are and hurting themselves to get attention. or vegetarians incessantly proclaiming the evils of meat eating. or religious buffs who try to batter you into believing in what they do. perhaps this is an outcome of strongly held belief... but you decide. ask yourself... do you really believe in what you stand for so deeply? or are you hiding from the truth?
basically speaking, you're not really unique if who you are is based on who you aren't. many people do not accept this, and choose to feel that they are truly unique and special, they tell themselves this is what they believe in, they do not conform to society. perhaps its true, perhaps it isn't. but the point is, no one is truly free from the societal structure. majority opinion has its imprint on most anything. no one is truly separate from it. so dun claim that appearances don't matter. cos they do.
Notice: optional off topic ranting by weird crazy guy, read at own peril.
[by the way, people want to stand outside of society because conforming shows weakness and surrender. which stands to scrutiny that people who reject societal norms desire strength and power. they draw this strength and power from the fact that they made a choice on where they stand; outside from where other people stand. so its the same as saying a murder is powerful and in control because he chose not to obey the law, something most people do. so i kinda dun understand fashionistas. they always dress to be different (lady gaga), dress to shock (lady gaga), dress to show their inner voice (lady gaga). thats cool. but people who see those as cool, people who look up to them, who praise them for being at the fashion forefront, are truly the ones i do not understand. those who dress fashionably give power to those who they learn from. designers who make radical, different designs are drawing power from the admiration of people who cannot make a choice themselves. and people who wear these designs are appreciated for their strength and ability to break from societal norms. and the people who admire those who start such a new fashion trend and follow after it, are merely manifesting and feeding on the that strength and ability. and those who call these people well dressed, who have impeccable fashion sense, are appreciating these people's borrowed and copied strength.
honestly, it seems just like this giant ripple effect. a designer tries to stand out by doing something different and celebs wear these designs to seem different, teenagers dress like celebs to be different and unique, and those who admire and look up to teenagers who are dressed like celebs are simply looking at a copied work, a borrowed strength of character. i don't see how beauty and true voice of self fit in. from skinny jeans to loose low hanging jeans and back to skinny jeans. each fashion trend is merely the opposite of the previous. i seriously dun see why everyone is so obsessed with it. but hey, who am i to rebel? *pulls on skinny jeans*]
i'll probably get fire from people cos of this. and i guess, no matter if your personal voice is truly cos u have strength of character, or cos you subconsciously choose to be different, no one can truly know. no offense, and i'm not here to pass judgement, but this is what i think, on my blog.
well, i'm out of steam, and my blog once again has a huge post. maybe bigger than last time. o.O but anyway, this is the stuff that goes on in my head sometimes, for no apparent reason. i wanna be a psychologist:/ but my grades are too lousy. if anyone is interested in donating some of their resolve to study, brains, or good results, please leave a message on the tagboard. thank you. (no medal or muffins this time, sorry!)
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